Days and dreams...

I have been having the loveliest, most languid dreams of late....where more often than not, I am being gently, but thoroughly courted and then slowly and deliberately kissed by a warm, funny, intelligent and soft woman...

I'm not sure where this is all coming from...well, apart from a deep need I have to find that special someone I guess... It certainly has crept up on me though, as I had all but given up on finding her...after the many different false starts and stops I have had of late...

Perhaps it is my subconsciousness's way of diverting my mind away from my money worries at the moment, where after the huge rent I pay, and then all the bills, I'm pretty much surviving on a wing and a prayer lately... so much, that I am considering selling or storing most of my furniture and down-sizing from a 1 bed flat, to a smaller studio apartment to see if I can at least live a little without worrying every moment that I only have £150 to last me the rest of the month after all the bills have been paid...

There aren't that many good studio flats on the market as yet, but from looking last year, they seem to come out in force around July-August time, so I will keep looking, and give my notice to the landlord as soon as I find one...

In the meanwhile, I'm contemplating putting together my own Zen-Cart template website and making some money that way (in addition to selling stuff on eBay and Amazon of course)... I've got the next few days off, and have downloaded some templates to interrogate and convert into my own downloadable designs... so who knows... I might have some income coming in soon, if I get my finger out seriously enough...

Anyway, a wonderful distraction of late has been some wonderful music videos made by a very talented Youtube artist called 'Vc620'. She has a wonderful knack for putting together the best Nikki/Helen (Bad Girls) music videos I've ever seen. Her latest, with Sarah McLachlan's 'Push' as a soundtrack, is just beautiful... The way that Helen looks at Nikki throughout this video, and the very soft and tender kiss towards the end of the music video is very much how my dreams have been of late... Ahhhh...to have a woman look at me that way, with such warm and avid affection in her eyes, and to be kissed so softly and tenderly... no wonder my dreams are so wonderfully painted that way of late... ;-)